


Lilo 'n' Loki ('n' Stitch)

by TajaReyul



Category: Lilo & Stitch (2002), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-24
Updated: 2012-06-24
Packaged: 2017-11-08 10:56:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/442456
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TajaReyul/pseuds/TajaReyul
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written about <a href="http://teapotsahoy.tumblr.com/post/23821581258/i-cant-believe-i-had-to-find-out-about-this-from">this drawing</a>.</p><p>Now translated into Russian by Rainy_EllioT <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/1032770/">here</a>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lilo 'n' Loki ('n' Stitch)

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Лило и Стич (и Локи)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1032770) by [Rainy_Elliot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainy_Elliot/pseuds/Rainy_Elliot)



Lilo threw the stick. “Fetch, Stitch!”

Stitch crossed his first two arms over his blue chest and shook his head emphatically.

“Come on, Stitch. You're supposed to be a dog. Dogs fetch sticks.”

“Not dog.”

“I know that and you know that and Nani and David and Mr. Bubbles and Doctor Jumba and Pleakley, but as far as the rest of the island is concerned, you're a dog. You don't want to get taken away, do you?” That was kind of a low blow, Lilo knew, but Stitch's cover as a dog was important to maintain. Plus she really wanted to have somebody to play fetch with.

Stitch sighed and scrambled, albeit slowly, in the direction the stick had flown.

He rooted around in the undergrowth for so long, Lilo wondered if he'd forgotten what he was supposed to be doing. She blew her bangs out of her eyes with an impatient puff. She supposed she only had herself to blame for that as she'd used the, “I got distracted and forgot,” excuse last week with Nani.

Stitch growled loudly once and the ferns shook as he backed out, dragging something much larger than a stick.

It was a _haole_ dressed in green and yellow from head to toe and wearing a helmet with huge gold horns on it. Lilo was so impressed that she forgave Stitch for not fetching the stick. Since the man was unconscious and pretty beat up, Lilo decided to take him home. If he had people, he could call them from the house. If not, well, they'd deal with that too.

“Bring him back to the house.”

Stitch growled again.

“You don't have to pretend to be a dog for that.”

“Okay,” Stitch agreed cheerfully, lifted the stranger over his head and followed Lilo.

* * *

Loki woke to find a young human girl and a blue, furred...thing leaning over him.

“Gah!” he shouted and flinched away from the blue thing. “What in the name of the Allfather is that monstrosity?”

“Stitch,” the blue thing held out one taloned paw. “Pleased to meetcha.”

“He's my dog,” the human offered. “Sort of. Were you in a fight?”

“What?”

“It's just that you have a black eye and your lip was bleeding. And your clothes are dirty. If you can stand up, you should take a shower. The bathroom's through here. David left some clothes here a while ago. I bet they'd fit you.”

Somehow, Loki found himself trundled into the tiny bathroom without actually willing himself to move. He had to remove his helm to avoid smashing the mirror or breaking the light fixture. There didn't seem to be anyplace to set it down, so he opened the door and put it in the hallway.

The small human grabbed it and dragged it away by one horn. “If you drop the rest of your clothes outside the door, I'll put them in the washer,” she informed him fearlessly.

“Human, do you know who I am?”

“Do you have amnesia? Nani can call the police when she gets home or we can ask Mr. Bubbles if he can find your people. He used to be a Seeing-Eye agent.”

Loki literally goggled. Midgardians were only fit to grovel at his feet and this small girl had the temerity to order him around in the most absurd and confusing way. He summoned his godly power and prepared to smite her. The blue thing interposed itself between him and her, stood up on its hind appendages and shook one claw at him.

“Ah ah ah,” it intoned warningly. “Shower now.”

Unnerved beyond all comprehension, Loki allowed his power to subside and retreated into the bathroom. The simple creature comfort of a hot shower suddenly seemed like an excellent idea. He was careful to put his rainment outside the door. He wouldn't put it past that blue thing _What, by Hel,_ was _it, anyway?_ to come in and get his attire and Loki didn't want it anywhere near his bare flesh.

When he'd used up most of the hot water, he decided he was done with his shower. He found a multicolored towel and wrapped it around himself. Poking his head out the door, he found a pile of human garments where his clothing had been. He dressed quickly in the tan drawstring trousers and blue shirt with a pattern of huge white flowers printed on it. There was even an pair of the sandals humans called “flip-flops” for him to wear. The outfit was unworthy of his godly self, but Loki comforted himself with the knowledge that no one would ever expect to see a Norse god in beachwear.

“You look lost,” the girl said.

“Like ugly duckling,” the blue thing added.

“I know what will make you feel better.” She dragged out a square machine and put a flat, black disc on it. “Elvis makes everything better.”

Noise issued from the box that Loki realized was what passed for music on Midgard.

_"Well, since my baby left me_  
_I've found a new place to dwell_  
_It's down at the end of Lonely Street_  
_At Heartbreak Hotel._

_You make me so lonely baby._  
_I get so lonely,_  
_I get so lonely I could die.”_

The song made him feel sadness, so he destroyed the machine.

“Hey!” The girl yelled. “You can't hardly find record players at the second-hand shop anymore. And what do you have against The King anyway?”

“Who is this king? I shall smite him for making me feel...things.”

“You can't smite him. First of all, he's The King. Second of all, he's been dead forever.”

“Is he a god?”

“No, I told you, he's The King.”

“How can he be forever dead if he's not a god?”

“I don't know.” She shrugged. Seeming to lose interest in the argument, she went to a small table in the corner of the room and pulled out paper and colorful writing implements. The blue thing followed. So did Loki, although more slowly. The girl and her blue pet took the two tiny chairs, so Loki sat on the floor, not that the chairs would have supported him.

“I can tell you're a person who has something bothering him. Maybe we can get to the root of your problems. Tell me what you remember from before Stitch found you. You do remember some things, don't you?”

“More than you will ever learn,” he replied wearily.

“Start wherever you want.” She looked at him expectantly, her fat, green writing implement held at the ready.

To his surprise, Loki found himself complying. He wasn't sure if it was her random approach (as the god of chaos, randomness was a trait he always appreciated) or the ever-present, though now quiet threat of the blue creature, but he told her of his battle with his brother and the Avengers. She scribbled on the pages in front of her, the tip of her tongue clamped between her teeth. By the time he was finished talking, he'd told her of growing up in Asgard as a son of Odin, only to discover later that he was nothing more than a changeling, stolen from his rightful parents and then cast aside.

The girl leafed through her pages. “I think I see your problem. The good news it that it's not completely your fault. Your dad shouldn't have taken you from your people, and once he did, he shouldn't treated you any different from his other kids.

“But that's not a good enough reason to go around wrecking things. Nani tells me all the time that violence doesn't solve anything, no matter how good it feels to paste someone who's saying bad things about you. All this stuff you did?” She fanned out the pages she'd worked on so diligently. There was an easily recognizable sketch of the Hulk swinging Loki around by one leg, another of Loki flying through the concrete canyons of New York on a grav-sled brandishing his staff, and there, a picture of Loki subverting Hawkeye, one of Loki tricking Thor into attacking the frost giants and a dozen other scenes of his perfidity. Some of them he was quite proud of, mostly the ones he'd gotten away with, as they say, scot free.

“It is not. Good,” she said with emphasis.

“I am the god of chaos,” he replied as if it explained everything. “And trickery,” he added for good measure.

“That doesn't mean you have to be bad. See, this is your badness level.” She turned around another drawing that she'd quickly roughed out while she'd been lecturing him. It was clearly a picture of Loki, mostly filled in with red. Only the horns and the very top of his helmet were not colored in. Off on one side were two boxes, one left blank, labeled 'good', and one colored red, labeled 'bad'. “It's pretty high, even though your badness isn't all your fault. Your problem isn't that you've forgotten things, it's that you can't let go of them.

“Try building something instead of tearing things down, for a change. Be nice to someone instead of being mean, once in a while. Just to see how it feels.”

He considered her words for a moment. “That could work. No one would expect it, which is always preferable. I shall let you and your...pet live.”

“There. You're already starting to reduce your badness level.”

“Thank you for your...hospitality, but I must leave you now. I need to find my brother and try being nice to him.” Loki grinned in anticipation. It wasn't a nice grin.

“Okay. Just remember, you're _ohana_ now. _Ohana_ means family. It means no one gets left behind.”

“Or forgotten,” added Stitch.

“Or forgotten,” the girl agreed. “So if you want to come back, we'll remember you. Even if we don't see you again, we'll still remember you.”

Loki stood, summoned his raiment to his body and willed it clean. He strode out onto the porch and likewise summoned his staff to hand. He inclined his head graciously to the girl and her pet. “Farewell,” he said and floated into the air.

* * *

“Aloha!” Lilo called, waving wildly, though the stranger didn't so much as glance back.

Stitch rattled off a string of syllables, sounding vaguely wise.

“I know, but his badness level won't go down unless he chooses to make it go down. You could threaten him into acting good, but he'd still be bad inside.”

Stitch chirped regretfully.

“Come on. Let's find Doctor Jumba. Maybe he can fix the record player.”

**Author's Note:**

>  _Heartbreak Hotel_ was written by Tommy Durden and Mae Boren Axton and recorded by Elvis Presley on RCA Victor.


End file.
